Delve Into Jesus : Questions : What's Happened Since I Met Jesus?

What's Happened Since I Met Jesus?

Posted by francis on 3/19/2008 8:45:56 AM

Dear Friends

I would love to have your advice on my spiritual problem which can be put very simply, I met Jesus Christ but Im not sure whats happened since.

Eight years ago while sitting in the bath these words formed in my mind and I sort of said them inwardly, I feel a gentle and growing sense that Jesus is for me. There and then I became overwhelmed by a wonderful, overpowering feeling of love happening to me, disabling all my awkwardness and tension, my apathy and my indecision, my fear and my bitterness, all of it crushed, overpowered, gone. And I felt completely liberated, in receipt of the most wonderful presence, a gift of total and overwhelming love inside me, flowing through me and out of me. For the next few minutes everything made sense perfectly, intensely and joyously. I had no doubt, and I still believe that in that moment I met the risen Christ and the Holy Spirit.

But Im really struggling to make sense of whats happened since.

At that time, intellectually, I was very concerned about harmony between different religions and social, humanitarian and political causes and I feared that this experience that I had had would lead me away from these causes and towards an anti-intellectual and narrow-minded way of thinking and worshipping.

Incredibly instead of committing to Christ I became a member of the Bahai Faith for the next three years. They said that Christianity, along with Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Buddhism and Zoroastrianism were all from the same source and were relevant for their period in time but were now superceded by the present dispensation of Bahaullah. They stressed the equality of the sexes and of the religions, of how the world had to unite to deal with problems of war and famine and global warming. This message appealed to me intellectually and so I convinced myself that my religious experience was not specifically of Christ (though deep down I knew that it was) and it was a general sign of approval of what the Bahais had told me.

Eventually I realised that the Bahais were not everything they had seemed and I admitted that I had lied to myself in claiming any sort of spiritual impulse towards the faith.

Over the next few years I drifted back into worshipping in Church and started to piece together a theology that took the risen Christ seriously yet was not anti-intellectual. In all of this I was committed to the reality of my religious experience in the bath eight years ago, and so in that respect I have made a sort of progress.

But that living, saving, presence of Christ, while I no longer deny it I am not in touch with it I dont feel it. I dont live from it or with it, its not a spiritual reality in my life.

And it makes me wonder is it possible that I met Christ but put myself outside of his presence by my failure to respond adequately at the time?

Is it of any benefit to me to acknowledge the reality of what happened, to be convinced that I really met Christ, if I dont feel his presence with me now?
I suppose what Im really asking is, where is Jesus for me now? I have no doubt that Jesus came into my heart in a powerful way but how do I explain the fact that I cannot perceive him there any more?

I am inclined towards a theology which says that once Jesus saves a person they remain saved. But did he save me by his presence there and then? Or does the fact that I failed to respond mean that my salvation never quite took place.

Im sure that you can appreciate what an urgent dilemma this is for me. I would be grateful for any advice you can give me.

Yours truly,

Francis

Comments

Hi Francis - I hope you will find some comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this dilemma. Others who are passing through similar experiences have been lovingly blessed with more joy and peace with Jesus than words can describe. He began a great work in you; His will is to complete this work. There may be many reasons why we lose sight of our connection to Him however, many beautiful lessons await you on the return journey. God may have chosen a special path to a unique relationship with each one of us. I can see cause to believe this in what you have written about your wonderful experience with Jesus. I hope you will diligently strive to pursue your way back to Him.

I know God enjoys our praise, but we must be the ones who truly benefit from whatever praise we offer Him. How your conflict is resolved may have much to do with your individual personality, except the basic tools we've been given will never be rendered obsolete. Praising God, prayer, studying the Word, and serving those around you are what we are commanded to do. For some of us, the diligence with which we use these tools, may determine the length of the journey or the impact of its completion. Jesus wants you to be sure of your salvation. Nevertheless, I think we cannot pray often enough, in a manner which acknowledges we have sinned and recognizes Jesus paid the penalty for those sins. We should pray every day for Jesus to come into our lives and rule us. Jesus wants you to pursue Him; I think He will answer you with assurance at the right time for you.

I wonder if our fast paced, ego-centric and technology driven society has contributed to so many losing their way. However, you can use technology to your advantage by using the resources at this site to guide you on your way. There are many insightful articles that may contribute to your growth (Try the article Am I still Saved?) You may find comfort in the ample opportunities to pray for others who are suffering through circumstance similar to your own. Explore the resources at this site; perhaps you can add to them. There is also much you can do to promote the social causes of interest to you - iin a ways which please God.

I'm sure others can offer more Biblically oriented answers, but I want you to know you are not alone. I will pray that you will again feel the enormous love of Jesus.

anonymous- 3/21/2008 11:15:15 AM

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