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Dealing With Difficult Trials - Part 5
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smiller, Founder, Legacy Youth Ministry Resources
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Note from Delve Christian Ministries: This series was authored by Steve Miller of Legacy Youth Ministry Resources, and was originally written as a lecture series for youth pastors. We are extremely grateful to Steve for allowing us to offer this series on Delve Into Jesus
Introduction
We've been talking about mastering your circumstances, before they master you. We've said that most people live on an emotional roller coaster, where their peace, joy and contentment with life are dependent on whether their circumstances are at a high or a low. But there's a way off the emotional roller coaster. A way to have a joy that lasts through even the hardest times. A joy that will make your life contagious, so that others will want what you've got.
But to have this joy, you've got to respond, not naturally, but radically. Often, you have to do the very opposite of what feels right. Does anyone remember some of the steps we talked about last week? We talked about asking God for help, giving the load to Him, and fighting bitterness with forgiveness.
Let's pray that God will teach us more of the radical response that only He can give us toward life's trials.
A. Resist Envy
Turn to Psalm 73 where we find a guy with a problem the we all face at one time or another. He's trying to follow God and be a good boy, but when he looks around him, it seems like the wicked people are getting all the breaks and he's left with all the struggles. Ever feel like this? Well, after having his private envy party, he comes to his senses toward the end of his writing. See if you can figure out what pulled him out of his envy. He's talking to God.
"Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
Those who are far from you will perish;
You destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds." (Ps. 73:23-28)
George Mangakis, who was tortured as a political prisoner, found help in pitying his torturers instead of himself. "At this moment I am deprived of the joy of seeing children going to school or playing in the parks," wrote Mangakis, "Whereas they have to look their own children in the face." (George Mangakis, "Letter in a Bottle," Atlantic Monthly,October 1971, p. 253, cited by Yancey, Where is God).
B. Don't Trust Your Emotions
"Never will I leave you;
Never will I forsake you." (Heb. 13:5)
Although God never leaves us, most Christians don't seem to live in a constant awareness of God's presence. Spurgeon is considered by many the greatest preacher who ever lived, but he often struggled with depression. He said that Luther's life might give a thousand instances of the same. C.S. Lewis, after His wife's death, said that when he prayed, it seemed like "A door slammed in your face, and a sound of bolting and double bolting on the inside. After that, silence." (A Grief Observed, p. 4) Lewis later found that God was there all the time. But our emotions, particularly during a crisis, can lead us astray. Don't trust them.
C. Get A Better Perspective
There are two ways to view a huge wave. The sand castle builder looks upon it with anguish, realizing that his beautiful creation may be destroyed in a brief moment. But a talented surfer frantically paddles toward that same wave, hoping to catch it for the ride of a lifetime. But it's exactly the same wave, viewed from two different perspectives.
How can we learn to surf life's trials, rather than merely endure them? We've got to learn to look at the waves through the eyes of a surfer. Here are some hints:
1. Realize you have all you need for your present happiness
"For the LORD God is a sun and shield;
the LORD bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless." (Ps. 84:11; Phil. 4:11-13)
"for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances." (Phil. 4:11)
Have you ever noticed how some dogs can live in a spacious, fenced in yard, but spend all their time at the gate, longing to get out?
A Polish believer had been imprisoned several times for his faith. Once, when passing one of his former prisons, he was overcome with emotion. He ran and embraced the building, saying, "God, thanks for the wonderful times we had together here."
Just think. No stereo, dating privileges, allowance, or telephone. But he was content.
Here's an indicator to show if you lack contentment: how often do you say to others, or just to yourself, "If only"
If only I were better looking
If only I were smarter
If only I my parents would get their act together
"If only this" Then what? Do you think you'd be happy? If you're discontent, don't count on it, because your circumstances will never be perfect.
Instead, our goal is to be like Habakkuk, when he said,
"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior." (Hab. 3:17-19)
But most of us don't seem to have the joy of the Polish believer or Habakkuk. We'd like to be able to find joy in the midst of our hard times, but practically speaking, how can we find such contentment?
2. See your problems in relation to your blessings.
"Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else. Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." (1 Thes. 5:15-18)
Some people are so negative that when they see a donut, all they notice is the hole.
Imagine that Kenny wakes up to a day that seems like a dream come true. He wakes to the smell of mom cooking his favorite breakfast. At school he realizes that he is about a week ahead in his homework. Incredibly, the lunch room serves a choice of steak or lobster. He gorge himself with his lobster, plus a friend's left-over lobster. School dismisses early and as he waits for the bus, a friend passes him a note. It reads, "I had a long talk with Leah (the most incredible girl in your school). She's madly in love with you." Getting on the bus, he steps on a fresh piece of gum. In the light of all that's gone on today, would it bother him?(No way!)
But let's imagine that day 2 is very different. Kenny sleeps through his alarm and his mom yells, "Grab a piece of cold bread on the way to school, you sluggard." In his first class his teacher reminds him of a long-term project that is due tomorrow. He had totally forgotten. As he walks into the lunch room, he sees a notice that reads, "Many students are suffering from food poisoning. But don't panic. This only concerns the few students who chose lobster at yesterday's lunch." His stomach begins to hurt. As he double over and makes his way to the clinic, his best friend comes up to him laughing. "By the way," he says, "you didn't believe my little joke about Leah liking you, did you?" Then, he steps on a fresh wad of chewing gum. Some of you, at this point,would throw your shoe down the hall and curse the day they were born. Why the different reaction from the chewing gum the day before? The incident was exactly the same. (Answer: the context in which it was seen.)
So our challenge is to become so aware of our blessings that our problems pale in comparison.
Now many of our blessings are temporal and changing. And since every good gift comes from above, we need to be thankful for them. If your family life is in shambles, you tend to forget that you may be reasonably healthy, be good at a certain subject at school, and have a friend.
We also have eternal and unchanging blessings (2 Cor. 4:18). I think that some Christians become so caught up in the wonder of these blessings that they are little affected by their situation here on earth. As the old hymn says,
"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace."
So, the more you get enamoured with these incredible blessings that can never be taken away, your short-term problems won't seem as big. How do you become more aware of these blessings?
Regularly thank God for them.
Don't spend all your prayer time asking God for stuff. Next time, when you spend some time with Him in prayer, tell Him you're not there to ask for anything. You just want to thank Him for what He's already given you.
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Spend time meditating on God's Word.
The world sets its eyes on the things that go wrong and complains. The mature Christian sets his eyes on the blessings that never change and gives thanks.
I'm convinced that the more we understand the eternal, unchanging blessings we have in Christ, the less we'll get rattled by the comparatively minor troubles we experience here.
Conclusion
Let's not wait to put into practice what we've been talking about. Brainstorm every blessing, some that change and some that never change, and thank God for them. You may have never before prayed out loud, but it's there's nothing to it. No special God language or way you have to hold your hands. Prayer is simply talking with God. And He can understand you the way you talk.
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