I need and want support from the brothers and sisters while I am waiting for the lord to answer my prayers. I believe that one of the issues I have been experiencing is loneliness and remorse. There are times that I have felt totaly alone with my requests to God regarding reconcilation with my husband. I left him for verbal abuse and then divorced him. My emotions took over and I reacted to them not waiting upon God. I KNOW now that I provoked him and it was to much for him to control himself. It is not an excuse for him, but it is a responsbility that I must face. It takes two to make a fire. Now that I am alone with our six year old son and returned to the father I see how many errors I am quilty of and thank the lord he has forgiven me and now I am asking him to help me do his will and wait. Has anyone else gone through what I have?

1/2/2009 1:20:14 PM by Camie4, Member of Delve into Jesus since 1/1/2009

Please read Psalm 27.
(May God bless you.)

1/2/2009 6:01:47 PM by Ignited~Faith, Member of Delve into Jesus since 2/20/2008

I am sorry that you are in a situation where you are feeling lonely and have remorse for the loss of your relationship. While you can not change your past, you can contribute to decisions that change your future. Taking responsibility for your actions and asking God for forgiveness-like you have done- are good steps in that direction. Since you are in a situation now that you are divorced from your former husband, if you are to reconcile, you must look at it as a fresh start with a new relationship with him. It is an opportunity to put healthy boundaries into place, to make sure you are in a place yourself where you do not allow abuse of any kind and that you see changes in his life that show you that he is also ready to move forward with a healthy relationship with you. All of these things must be grounded in a solid relationship with God. That is one thing you can do while you wait on God- focus on Him, ask him to fill the gap of you not having a husband to meet your needs right now and work on establishing your bond with God.
I truly believe that God really does want reconciliation, where it is possible. Just as it took two to divorce, though, it will take two to reconcile. Is your former husband ready to build a new relationship with you? Does he have a spirit of forgiveness? Would you both be able to put what happened in the past in the past and not use it as fuel for future fires? Does he have a relationship with God and is he ready to put God first in a marriage? Has he shown by his actions that he also takes responsibility for the dissolution of your marriage and that he is making steps towards changing himself and his anger? Even if both parties are willing and ready to make the changes, often couples reunite out of loneliness, guilt or remorse before really establishing a healthy new pattern of behavior and boundaries and they are sadly placed back into the same situation again, increasing the hurt for both parties.
God never wants to see the dissolution of any marriage. It is also important too for your son to have a relationship with his father and, if possible, to have both parents married, loving and in a secure, healthy relationship.
While it is very difficult to wait, waiting is not an inactive state- it is an opportunity to be quiet with God and to pray and to listen to the direction that he is leading you in. Even if your relationship is gone forever, God can still shower you with His love and give you the strength you need to raise your son and He can truly fill your loneliness with his presence.
God really does care about you, what you are going through and He can heal your heart. Keep your focus on Him and take this time too to spend with your son. The decisions you make now, your relationship with God and the way you move forward with your life all will have a profound effect on your son's life. You can show your son how he too can turn to God when he is hurting and you can use your example of how you have made mistakes but God forgives to show him that no matter what he faces in life, God is gracious, forgiving and loving.

1/3/2009 7:59:26 PM by Elizabeth, Vice-President, Delve Christian Ministries

Camie4, I received your message. I am unable to reply directly (your preference to receive email is off) but I want to let you know that we are praying for you and your situation.

1/3/2009 10:54:59 PM by Elizabeth, Vice-President, Delve Christian Ministries

Yeah I can relate. In my past marriage things didn't always go MY way. I knew exactly what would set my ex off..and being honest I did just that. Then somehow turned everything on him to justify what I was doing. Like you God revealed ALOT to me after my leaving and divorcing him. Man...it's true that ain't NOTHING like a whipping from God! Things got so bad that I didn't are couldn't do anything else but fall to my knees. I started asking God to fix what I had messed up...I was speaking of the marriage I had destroyed...but to my suprise the Lord started with me. LOL...I had never seen a mirror so BIG..and that told so much. But He did exactly what I asked of Him...He fixed what I messed up..I am a new person now. And I consider myself an great wife. It took some time and a whole lot of prayer, meditation on God and faith...and if you do them three things...like me you will indeed get past it all. I will have you in my prayers...God Bless

1/4/2009 8:46:07 AM by mexbias08, Member of Delve into Jesus since 12/25/2008

Camie,
The answer is found in Psalm 118:8.

Mexbias08,
That's the way God works. He loves us and knows that changing the circumstance is not always the answer. The change must be within us. Then, we are okay no matter what the circumstances may be. It is His loving kindness that causes US to change. I love Him.

1/6/2009 9:47:15 AM by mrspiggy, Member of Delve into Jesus since 1/18/2008

Mrspiggy
You are 100 correct. I often tell my children to look at God as their parent. If they don't do what I (their earth parent) ask of them they wont get a reward that they are seeking. Experience will have to teach them. But if they do as I tell them...everything their hearts desire I am all for it. See as a parent it is not good to change their circumstances..they have to learn...so they will know next time. I believe that this s how the Lord works with us. He is our Parent. And like you...I LOVE MY FATHER!!!!!

1/6/2009 10:05:19 AM by mexbias08, Member of Delve into Jesus since 12/25/2008